the full totally true report archive!!!

latest issue - #2

around 50 days ago, silverchair has gone on haitus without a trace!!! nobody has been talking. everything is worried and daniel has been seen skateboarding. on roofs. also some people will say he has 20 hands

issue #1 - "daniel johns seen arguing with a vending machine"

in a shocking turn of events, local bystanders reported seeing daniel johns aggressively pointing at a vending machine outside a bowling alley!!! allegedly, the machine “disrespected him” by eating his dollar!!! sources say the vending machine is “traumatized”!!!